your nan reaches for a hug as the monkey’s paw curls all but one finger: the middle

my dog doesn’t piss and shit in toilets 🤠

no, obviously not

on the flip side, one of my favourite parts about muting emote and chat in certain games is that the idea of a person wasting time flaming the shit out of me while I remain perfectly oblivious to it is fucking funny

but what is love?

🥺

how can people know if you’re bluffing if you don’t even know if you’re bluffing?

🤠

confirm that ‘bongo obliterator’ mia will be allowed to ‘play [client] like bongos’: y/n

i’m giving you a 90 degree tip

you mean a 90 percent tip right?

…

❒ B ❒ V ❒

i bet your butt has a crack in it

everyone needs a tool that in their arsenal

it feels nice when the closet gets a little bigger, if just for a moment 🥹

another, less violent way of phrasing your frustrations: my cognitive ability has just been bonked in the kneecaps and robbed of 10 BQ

100% much easier when you just straight up fabricate your results

everyone imperator until the wealthy roman geriatrics smuggle gladii across the pomerium

i think more than anything this more reveals that you just wanted to make a commentary on genital mutilation. fair enough but you didn’t really need to make so many assumptions about op to do it

they really got that just-dipped-my-balls-in-the-unidentifiable-buffet-soup-and-it-was-scorching kinda look to em