Hell yeah.

Fuck adobe.

I submitted a complaint about this exact thing to one of the government sites so im going to pretend I had a part in this

The monkey’s paw curls…

Around hitlers dick

And amphetamine

What are they going to hit?

100 miles of grass in any direction?

One of my favorites

I had a roommate exactly like this in college

That poor dog and poor cat usually ended up locked in her tiny bedroom in our 3br apartment all day

She called the cops on us a couple times for having friends over

Idk I don’t think it’s that bad for 18th century farmers

“No soldiers can squat in your house unless they have a letter from uncle sam saying they can”

Idk the scary door isnt bad

Wrong warm water tastes smoother and smells weirder

Cold water tastes spikier and doesnt smell weird

Your argument doesn’t seem all that separated from the Nazi Nuremberg defense

“I was just following orders”

The world collectively decided that defense would not stand

Hey its me your 2nd uncle

I need about $3.50 to pay for shipping on a package from a nigerian price who needed my help

I know we said over 100 for this but

Donkeyballs

Ive been trying to figure this out all day and thats not it

Im pretty sure ive conflated parts of Mr murder and a completely different author/book called the mark of the assassin and honestly maybe parts of a 3rd book i havent remembered yet

I read those ~15 years ago

I think ive also ready exactly one koontz book

I think it involved a child genius inventing time travel with something that looked like salt and pepper shakers because his family was being targeted by an assassin for some reason

Also might have been a fever dream not sure

Ive dubbed him the businessman titan

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Babe wake up new lemmy lore just dropped

Im almost certain eternally filling out myworkday applications will be my personal hell

And actual reindeer

🍍