Any special requirement for Alpine, or just “because I want to”?

I’d be a bit concerned with having the git repo also be hosted on the machine itself.

Please tell me you have a tested backup solution/procedure in place.

It honestly feels hostile

Very well put. I have the same feeling and it gets worse with every iteration.

Yeaaah… No.

Minsc is also relatively weak compared to other potential party members.

Your boot disk is (potentially) dead.

Good start st least.

Not a natural ingredient though.

Explainexplainxkcd.com when?

Do you have a server, connection and domain available?

If yes, a simple Joomla setup with a single static page should work well.

and instead just copied it everything from the Greeks.

Pizza with tuna, onions and pineapple.

There are a few that work really well for me.

DJ Topcat - 50 ways to kill your lover

Paul Simon - 50 ways to leave your lover vs. Morcheeba ft. Slick Rick - Women lose weight

Excellently matching contents, makes this a really good fit.

https://bootiemashup.com/top-ten-albums/bootie-top-10-august-2006/dj-topcat-_-50-ways-to-kill-your-lover-slick-rick-vs-paul-simon/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DZqUapC5tQ

Also really good:

DJ Schmolli - Wicked Wedding

Chris Isaak - Wicked Game vs. Billy Idol - White wedding

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jWsExznfT-E

And a third one which feels like it could have been an original song.

Loo & Placido - Toop Toop Groove

Madonna - Into the groove vs. Cassius - Toop Toop

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dWXDIDNiUHo

Ah yes, the old “criticizing us is antisemitism” defense.

While I do love Syncthing, it solves a different set of requirements.

Grafana + Prometheus + data gathering will at least give you the resource and usage stats.

Uh oh…

Subtitles being “burned into” the frames instead of being a separate track, also known as hard-coded sometimes. This enables one to use subtitles on devices which cannot traditionally use them or screw up the display. But this means the server needs to re-encode each and every frame, which is a massive load on the server.

tasty

Being tasty is mostly a matter of spices. Apart from your dead microwave, what do you have in your kitchen?