Congratulations you just gave the fundamentalist nutters all the icbm silos.
Yeah, uh, they already have them.
Plus there’s tons in the listed areas?
Naw WA has a few
I hate so say it, but you should grab Michigan and Wisconsin. Much like a girl I used to know: We can fix her, and she has huge lakes that I find appealing. Or something like that.
Isn’t Wisconsin like a cold version of Alabama?
Yeah, it sucks. But Look at that map. Those lakes are fairly important. Well either that or do a Robert Evans plan and just nuke them.
Bump for nuking the so called “Great” lakes
C’mon now, the last thing Cleveland and Buffalo need is radioactive lake effect snow
Accepting pleas from other comments here, Canada could get away with about this. And if they have the whole Pacific border, I’ll also throw in Hawaii for free.
We should give Texas to Mexico just to spite them
Brilliant.
Having Arizona would be a big L for Canada
You’d have to create a corridor through Southern Idaho and Northern Utah to join the new state of “New Mexirado” with the rest if you removed Arizona… Hard work, but I believe it could be done.
As a New Mexican, I approve either of these options to join Canada
Yeah, but how else do they get Colorado and New Mexico?
Get Virginia too!
Fuck that bougie ass state. Entirely occupied by weapons contractors. Leave them in New Honkia
I was just hoping to be Canadian.
Hm. Went with cutting Washington and Oregon in half rather than full take. Pretty bold, but makes some sense.
Theres citylife washington and middle of nowhere washington. Occasionally middle of nowhere washington likes to throw fits in the city to support trump because they have nothing better to do
Though i guess that goes with cali as well. Lots of the non cities in the west coast just really love trump despite reaping all the state benefits that are very non-republican.
Y’all are going to regret taking Arizona. And, frankly, everything in California not in view of the coast.
Nooo, take Michigan, too!
Colorado
Why would I want to join Canada??? I don’t do well in the cold smh my head
-Life expectancy will go up from a world ranking of 48th (USA) to 20th (Canada).
-Education will get better from 31st (USA) to 19th (Canada).
-Math scores will improve from 34th (USA) to 9th (Canada).
-Robberies will go down from 98 per 100,000 population to 62.
-Traffic accident deaths will drop from 12.7 per 100,000 to 5.3.
-You will spend half as much on health care yet get better outcomes.
-Poverty in Canada is 1/3 the rate in the USA.
-Although Canada has fewer millionaires, we more fairly distribute wealth (better income equality).
-The minimum wage in Canada is double that in USA.
and most important you will be happier (Canada ranked 15th, USA 23rd in happiness).
(We couldn’t find a politeness index, but thank you for reading)
How are you now ✋
Good and you
Not s’bad
Imagine how much worse all of those statistics will get once they absorb large chunks of the US!
I can assure you that the vast majority of Canadians are well aware of that fact and totally disinterested in become part of the US or taking on any part thereof.
Americans joining Canada would have to give up their guns and other weapons, compete that training and licensing processes, and if successful would have the revocable and modifiable privilege of owning a very small selection of approved guns. They would have to accept that religious freedom in Canada, which is much higher than in the US, means that you are free to practice your religion in any way you choose as long as it doesn’t effect anyone else’s rights and you are free to have no religion at all. They would have to accept that it is settled law in Canada that a woman’s healthcare decisions are between her and her healthcare provider and none of anyone else’s business. They would have to accept that everyone has the right to marry, has had the right for decades, and that the only thing destroy traditional marriage is traditionally married people. They would have to accept that free speech in Canada does not include racism or hate speech. Most Americans would not fit in in Canada and we are not interested in becoming Americans and giving up the things that make us the best country in the world.
Not really. Canada’s getting all the states that are doing the heavy lifting in those shitty numbers. If not for them, every metric would be worse.
Wouldn’t you get most of the millionaires and billionaires by including California and New York and the stats will start going to the US level or worse?
How about prison pop? We making progress there?
Canada is 85 per 100,000 and the US is 146 per 100,000. Canada is a world leader in Corrections. We are focused on rehabilitation and reintegration. That’s why whenever there is a breakdown of a government Correctional Service Canada is on the Nation Building team that the UN sends in to help rebuild. I worked at CSC for 25 years and knew a guy who was on the UN plane that crashed in Kosovo during the Nation Building exercise there.
Why doesn’t everyone move to Canada then?
Because despite what the neo-fascists in the US (and in Alberta and the Conservative party) say it is very difficult to move to Canada. We don’t have open borders.
You move that gods damned line to include Michigan. Right fucking now.
Nope. Move to a real blue state if you wanna come. MI has betrayed us too many times. We don’t need that in New Canada.
You guys decided to vote for the fascist.
So did Minnesota.
Okay okay. We’ll round up and murder the MAGATs and their moms. Then we can join, right?
Huh?
Michigan is a red state though.
Include Colorado and Hawaii.
Oh man I’d love to see the civil unrest in the red States when they don’t have us new Yorkers to give them their welfare payments.
Same from the west coast. If only cali oregon and washington could just be a west coast alliance separate from the rest of the problem states.
On behalf of California, we accept this proposal, and we accept Canada as our new federal government.
I also propose we officially refer to the remainder of the US as “Dumbfuckistan”.
West coast resident. I’m ready, let’s do it. The rest of the US hates us.
Seriously, why isn’t the Canadian government offering US states to join them? It would be the perfect response to Trumps bullshit.
You want Canada to submit to the US? Hey Oregon, California, and the others, wanna join us instead?
If California leaves the US it would fucking bankrupt the US.
America has already proven it’s willing to go to war to keep territory, Canada doesn’t want that fight.
keepsteal territoryFTFY
Also: why not give Texas back to Mexico? It’d solve their obsession with “the border problem.”
Because Mexico already has enough problems without having to deal with Texans?
I’m neither American nor Canadian but from what I’ve heard, maybe hand Alberta over to the US?
I’m in Alberta right now and it’s probably the place that would most likely accept that offer.
Maybe we could have BC come in and do a left wing inquisition. All the right wingers will be banished to the badlands and that will be handed over.
ITT: People pretending that Oregon, Michigan, and probably Washington don’t have a huge population of total fuckos.
Carve a line down the coasts. You don’t want the whole state. And while you’re at it, take the lakes and Chicago
Eastern Washington people have been wanting to separate from Western Washington for a really long time. Western Washington is like “well fuckin do it.” But nobody actually tries to secede because EW’s dependent on WW’s economy.
Yeah, East side of the cascades in OR and WA is extremely conservative. But they are currently hopelessly outnumbered.
We had to accept Oregon in order to draw a line down to California. We sure as FUCK aren’t accepting Idaho.
